Posted by: rodalex87 | November 5, 2010

Aimless Search For Love: Volume 1

How get I get here? Depressed and ashamed

Wondered what happened to the real Ashland McBryer

Fifteen years ago I was playing with my dolls and stuffed animals

Just a regular girl, ponytails and dresses my daily attire

But now I’m just tired, and my attire has lessened

No need for clothing because I’m often on my back naked

Every week I’m giving my body to a man I barely know

He thinks his game won me over, (yeah right) I didn’t listen to a word he said

I simply gave myself to him because I’m lonely and afraid

Scared I’ll live then die and never capture true love

And like a kid that tries to catch a bird

What I’m really after always flies away, an aimless search for love

Fifteen years ago it happened, and my life has never been the same

A victim of a relative’s lust, my virginity stolen from me

Again and again I was raped, but my uncle told me it was out of love

But if this is love how come if I tell he promises to kill me?

My father was never around, and in my teens my uncle grew tired of me

So I went seeking others, desperate for a man’s affection

Man after man entered into me, but the love I wanted always evaded me

Well if I can’t have a man’s heart I guess I’ll settle for his attention

Now I’m in my twenties, a mother with three kids to feed

My life already over, no hope or love for me

I often think about the God my grandma told me about

As a young girl she read me bible stories, but one keeps sticking out

She said that God became a man and died on a tree

And spread his ARMS OPEN, presenting everlasting love to me

But if Jesus is like any other man I’ve ever met then I know this is just fairy tale

Because all men take what they want then like jailbreak, bail

I said that if Jesus is like any other man I’ve ever met then I know this is just fairy tale

Because all men take what they want then like jailbreak, bail.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

Categories

%d bloggers like this: